


Next time,

by im_kyunie



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: All ships are there but extra Showkyun lol, Angst, Cuddling & Snuggling, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Forehead Kisses, M/M, Multi, Sleeping Together, Sleepy Cuddles, Sleepy Kisses, i love Showkyun
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-22
Updated: 2019-05-22
Packaged: 2020-03-09 19:45:38
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,705
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18923815
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/im_kyunie/pseuds/im_kyunie
Summary: The members tried a little too hard. Changkyun is upset. They comfort him with kisses.





	Next time,

**Author's Note:**

> This can be found on wattpad under this username  
> @im_kyunie

Changkyun was pretty confused but at the same time, he thought that he knew what was going on. He knew what was going on when he asked Hyungwon if he could go to the store with him but he refused. He knew what was going on when Kihyun forgot about his packed lunch. Or when Jooheon and Hoseok wouldn't cuddle with him, saying they're busy. Hyunwoo and Minhyuk would stay in one room the whole day and not come out to hang out with Changkyun in the living room. He knew what was going on.

That's how he was treated during the No mercy era. Left out.

Changkyun tried very hard to win every members heart in any way that he could. And he thought that he finally did. But obviously not.

At times like this, when he was stressed and needed to talk to someone he would go to Shownu, their leader, or stay up all night with Minhyuk and just speak about everything. But this time he couldn't, I mean what could he say? Why do you still not like me? He thought that the answer was pretty easy.

He joined the show after one of their friends was eliminated, even he would've hated it if that happened to him. But what could he do? That was his dream and the opportunity was right there in front of him.

At the start, Changkyun thought that as long as he could pursue his dream he wouldn't mind being lonely and alone. But as times went by it got harder and harder on him. And the show wasn't making it any better by scripting everything into something even more dramatic.

He never thought that being ignored and left out was something so hard, and to be honest, it wasn't so hard, not as hard as being ignored by your team members who once cared about you. For him, right now was harder than then. At least at the time, he didn't know them and he didn't know how comforting they were, how nice and caring they were, but now he knows. Now he knows how nice they are and how caring they are. This was what made this even worse.

They were such nice people yet they were ignoring and neglecting him.

One night, while he was having these overwhelming feelings and these negative thoughts, his tears just started rolling down uncontrollably. He pulled the fleecy blanket over his head, trying to keep his voice down but his negative thoughts never left him. The thoughts that he's not enough, the thoughts that he must've done something wrong, the thoughts that it was just him, the thoughts that made him less and less confident and more self-conscious. They were coming back, those thoughts were coming back and the cause of the thoughts was none other than the cure of them.

His members.

His members who helped him drive away from his thoughts. They were the members driving him back into those thoughts.

While he was still crying, he heard the door slung open and shut, causing him to lower his voice and still his body.

"Kkukkung, you sleeping?" It was Kihyun's voice, coming from Minhyuk's side of the room. Why was Kihyun in their room so late at night? He wanted to ask but it probably wasn't the best idea with his face drowning in tears so he kept his quite. Changkyun heard the opening of Minhyuk's closet and some shuffling of what seemed like boxes then the closet door shut close. Why was Kihyun just casually going through Minhyuk's closet? They never did that. Minhyuk never let anyone touch his closet. But Changkyun ket his quite again. Then he heard Kihyun's footsteps coming closer and closer to his bed, making him hold his breath, suddenly there was a dip on the bed and Kihyun lay next to him, shuffling his petite body under the blankets with Changkyun's back to him.

Changkyun smiled to himself a little, maybe the members don't hate him, maybe they're just really busy. He felt Kihyun's hand wrap around his waist and he snuggled closer, "Good night, Kkung." He mumbled into the younger's hair. Changkyun made sure to hide his face as he turned around and huddled his body closer into Kihyun's, seeking the warmth he needed as he nestled his face into the older's chest. Kihyun didn't say anything and just pulled him closer and planted a small kiss on the crown of his head.

 

Kihyun always acted like the strong, confident and un-touchy one but he too was actually hurt a lot in the past and had many scars, but he learnt from those and moved on with the help of his members. Also, he was very touchy. In private anyway, not in front of cameras.

. . . . . .

. .

. . . . . .

Morning came and when Changkyun woke up he realised that Kihyun had already woken up and he was probably preparing breakfast now, he looked over at Minhyuk's bed and he was already awake too, weird, he thought, Minhyuk doesn't usually wake up that early. He stretched his body a little and got up, rubbing his eyes as he made his way the kitchen.

As soon as he stepped his way out of the room he noticed the way the members were whispering to each other about something but as soon as they saw Changkyun they stopped. Changkyun saw that very clearly but brushed off, trying not to show his hurt feelings, "Kkung!" He heard Minhyuk shout, "how dare you to betray me like that." He looked at the older male confusedly, tilting his head to the side, "How could you let Kihyun sleep with you, you never let me hug you to sleep." He said, a small pout forming on his mouth making Changkyun smile, as he was about to speak Kihyun interrupted him, "He likes me more, admit to it."

"Nobody likes short asses people like you." Minhyuk retorted back.

"Me and Changkyun are short so you just basically said you don't like Changkyun." Kihyun retorted back causing Minhyuk to panic, "No! Kkung, that's not true I swear." He started spouting nonsense about how much he loved him and cared for him, Kihyun laughing at the side for driving Minhyuk into his panic mode of just spouting anything that came to his mind to defend himself.

 

. . . . . .

. .

. . . . . .

 

Throughout the week, Changkyun was very glum and gloomy, he was dejected. His members were suddenly acting extra 'busy', none of them seemed in their right minds. It seemed as though they were planning something behind his back. 

Maybe your departure from the group. The voice said in his head. He wanted to shake the thoughts away, to tell them they were wrong, that it wasn't true. But he couldn't.

Yet again, he cried himself to sleep.

 

. . . . . .

. .

. . . . . .

"Changkyun, this is about when you weren't part of us." Hyungwon said, "We really need to discuss this privately." Sighing out loudly, he ruffled his hair back, glancing towards his members.

"But I am now," Changkyun said, hurt was obvious from his voice but the members were blinded by something else and didn't see or hear the hurt ominous vibe coming from him.

"That doesn't change anything, please give us some privacy." Changkyun looked down at his feet, feeling the tears welling up in his eyes he turned around, "You're right." He said and just left.

You're right. I wasn't a part of you. I'm still not a part of you. I will never be a part of you.

 

After crying his eyes out at the playground near their house, he wiped his tears away and went to a public bathroom to wash his face, hopefully, to hide the fact that he had been crying.

It was one hour later and Changkyun finally made it back to the dorm with a heavy heart syncing with his footsteps. When he beeped in the passcode to their house and opened the door he heard a few whispers behind the door but when he opened the door fully there was no light. He took his shoes off and made his way further inside the house.

"SURPRISE!" The older members shouted altogether as all the lights lit up revealing to Changkyun a very nicely decorated room, the walls were covered with all the colourful decorations and the table was full of food, in the middle of them all was a big, circular cake saying 'happy bday to our Kkung'.

Upon seeing the situation in front of him Changkyun collapsed to the floor, tears coming down like a waterfall uncontrollably. He couldn't contain his emotions.

The members were all so shocked and baffled that it took them a few seconds to realise that their Maknae was crying, on the floor. They all dropped whatever was in their hands and made their way over to the youngest. Jooheon being the first one to run forward and engulf him in a hug, "Kyun..." he mumbled, pulling away to wipe his tears, "What's wrong?"

"H-Hate, hate y-you," Changkyun said in between his little sobs and hiccups, wailing away all his doubts, wailing away all the negative feelings and once again it was his members driving them away.

"Kyun, what do you mean-" Jooheon started but Changkyun slapped him on the chest, not too hard but it was hard enough to push the older away. This time Hoseok came forward, easily defending himself against the little slaps the younger was throwing his way. He picked him up and sat him down on the sofa so that they could calm him down somehow.

"Stop." He said, putting his hand up as if talking to a puppy. Changkyun looked up at him but kept on wailing, Hyunwoo on the side sucked in a sharp intake of breath as if to scold Changkyun, "Stop." He said and Changkyun glanced at him contemplating for a moment before he forced his tears to stop, sniffling his nose up.

Hyunwoo smiled widely at him, "Good boy," he said ruffling the younger's black hair, Changkyun gave him a hopeless glare and pushed his hands away. Hoseok scoffed, "Really? Even in a situation like this you only listen to him?" He laughed to himself, murmuring a little 'only Hyunwoo can control him.' under his breath.

Hyunwoo ignored his remark and sat down next to Changkyun, patting his back gently, "Talk." Was all he said but Changkyun's eyes welled up with tears and he bit his lower lip like a small puppy, trying to stop himself from crying again. Hyunwoo's heart broke at that, "Kyunie...Talk." Although Hyunwoo wasn't a man who spoke so much, he knew how to comfort others and he knew how to listen to their concerns. He didn't talk a lot but the few words that he spoke held a lot of emotions in them. He was sincere.

"I-You know-" he glanced at Hyunwoo with tears in his eyes, threatening to fall down. Changkyun looked at him as if asking for permission if he could just cry, "You can cry," Hyunwoo said in defeat as he pulled Changkyun into a hug, patting and tapping his back gently as if he was forcing every bad and negative thought out of Changkyun, "What became of this birthday surprise?" He asked around, looking at the other members who were sitting in front of the couch, waiting for the youngest to calm down and speak.

After a while of crying Changkyun finally stopped crying, looking up at Hyunwoo with his anticipative, doe eyes and Hyunwoo without hesitation grabbed a tissue and wiped his tears away, "cried enough?" He said as he handed him another tissue for him to wipe his nose. He pushed Changkyun's hair out of his face and planted a small kiss on his forehead.

"Will you tell us what happened now?" Hyungwon spoke, gently caressing Changkyun's knee with his thumb, giving him a small smile.

"Just me." He said, with his head down, but Jooheon who was now sitting next to him on the other side spoke up, "we're not getting anywhere like that." 

"It was just me being stupid. Too dense to realise the situation." He said causing Jooheon to scoff, "You're not dense. We just made sure to not make it obvious." He said, "we used every measure that we could take." He continued with a laugh, "we tried very hard."

"Yeah, it seemed like it," Changkyun said, "you didn't have to try so hard." He said as he inhaled deeply and exhaled out, getting ready to tell them everything.

He told them all about his feelings, the feelings he had kept inside the whole time and he also talked about how stupid he was for having such thoughts about the members that he knew so well. When he told them about all the negative thoughts that he had, all of them gasped, feeling bad for what they had indirectly caused.

"When Hyungwon said 'that doesn't change anything' I just felt like that no matter how hard I tried or had tried or would try, I could never be a part of you." He said sniffling again, Hyungwon who was sat right in front him, still caressing his knees stopped and gave him a light squeeze to get him to look at him, "you were part of us from the start Changkyun."

Changkyun exhaled deeply, "is that why you were going through Minhyuk's closet?" He said looking at Kihyun who was nodding, "you were awake?" 

"I KNEW IT!" Minhyuk shouted, "you were awake and you still let him hug you to sleep," he said, "I'm disappointed Kyun." he tried to sound stern and angry but Changkyun could see the small pout on his lips, "we can cuddle today..."Changkyun said lowly to which Minhyuk huffed and turned his head away, "nevermind if you don't want to..." the younger one said with a slight smirk, "I will just cuddle with Ki-" he was interrupted with Minhyuk crushing him in a hug, "No! You're sleeping with me tonight!"

Changkyun apologised to them and thanked them for being by his side and for the birthday surprise that he already ruined despite them putting so much care into the whole event.

"Who said it's ruined!" Hoseok shouted from across the room with a box of beer in his hands, "we're gonna drink tonight!" he kept shouting as he lined the cans of beer on the desk, each member looking at him confusedly and fearfully, "after we light out the candles of course

"Who are you?" Hyungwon blurted out, "where's did you take Hoseok?" 

Hoseok giggled and lighted up the candles and handed each one of them a beer, except Changkyun, he had to put out the candles first.

"Happy birthday to you...Happy birthday to you..." they all sang in unison, "Happy birthday dear Kkukkung, Happy birthday to you!" they finished and clapped frantically gesturing Changkyun to make a wish and blow out the candles.

They didn't drink too much because Hoseok refused to let them drink more saying they had schedule early in the morning and that they had to head to sleep soon.

 

Minhyuk went to the bathroom telling Changkyun to sleep on his bed tonight, not forgetting the promise Changkyun made with him earlier that night.

When Changkyun made his way over to his bedroom, Hoseok followed behind him, giving him small glances, "Hyung, do you want to say something?" Changkyun asked to which Hoseok gasped, "No, why would you think that?" Changkyun scoffed, "Your face is screaming worries hyung," He said and laid down on the bed.

"I just want to say if something like this happens again I want you to talk to us, me, anyone." He sighed, "Also, you were a part of us from the start." Hoseok leaned down and pecked Changkyun on the cheek, causing the younger to smile, "Good night, Changkyun." The older said and left the room, almost bumping into Jooheon who walked in at that time.

"What's wrong with him?" Jooheon mumbled as he practically jumped on the bed, cuddling Changkyun, "Minhyuk hyung will be here in any second and he will kick you out." Changkyun giggled at the face Jooheon made, "Humph, I don't care." He replied. 

A few moments of silence passed by, Jooheon just cuddling Changkyun, "You know," He started, "I felt betrayed that you didn't even talk to me about what you felt like." Jooheon spoke in a low voice that seemed sulky but also serious, "next time, talk to me about what you feel like." he said and Changkyun knew what was coming next so he closed his eyes and as expected Jooheon planted a small kiss on his lower cheek near his jaw, "next time, I'm gonna get real sulky if you keep to yourself like that. And also, you said you hated me. I will get back at you for that." he said and left the room, soon popping his head back in for a small goodnight wish.

Changkyun was truly thankful for his members, how they took care of him like he was their real younger brother. And honestly, Changkyun loved his members as much as he loved his own brother, his members were his family. His brothers from different mothers.

Shortly after Jooheon left, Kihyun shuffled his feet into the room, looking rather awkward, "so much for someone kissing me all over the other night," Changkyun said causing Kihyun to form a scowl on his face, "shut up." he said as he sat on the edge of the bed, "I'm not gonna beat around the bush and just get to the point," he said as he sighed out, "next time if you have anything like this going on please tell us. If I had known how you felt then to hell with this surprise," he said causing Changkyun to grin. Kihyun hesitantly leaned down causing Changkyun to snicker and snigger. Kihyun planted a small kiss on his cheek and slapped him lightly on the chest, "next time, I'm gonna kill you." The older said and chuckled his way out of the room.

Hyungwon walked in and paused in front of the door, sighing out loudly, "honestly, if you had just told us earlier I wouldn't have to feel guilty right now and I'd be asleep right now." He walked over to Changkyun and just stood in front of him for a while with his hands on his hips, like a mum scolding his child. Except, he was apologizing, "I'm sorry..." he said and Changkyun smiled softly at him, "hyung, I know you didn't mean it." He said. Hyungwon stook there a little longer before he leaned down and gave Changkyun a hug and a kiss near his neck before pulling away, "sleep." he said and went out.

"Kyunie?" Hyunwoo called out and Changkyun turned around to face Hyunwoo standing awkwardly by the door. The younger gestured him to come in as he sat up and patted the seat next to him. Hyunwoo smiled and sat down, rubbing his knee out of awkwardness. 

"Kyunie..." Hyunwoo began and Changkyun sighed, he knew he was gonna get scolded and he knew that he deserved it, "I know how much it hurts you to have those thoughts and I know it's hard on you. I know how you feel and I understand you, I understand that it's hard for you to speak about those things. But I want this to be the last time that you hide your feelings from us. I feel as though I'm not worthy of leading the group at times like this." He sighed out, running Changkyun's thigh, " Also, Kyunie...you were a part of us from the start and you know that. It was just the producers who wanted to produce a very over-scripted drama. And we were, you were the victim of it."

"I want you to stop thinking like that from now on." He said, "I'm not scolding you. So you can lift your head up." Hyunwoo tilted Changkyun's head up with his hand. Changkyun smiled softly at him. 

As Hyunwoo was about to leave Changkyun tugged at the hem of the long sleeved shirt that Hyunwoo was wearing. Hyunwoo looked at him, puzzled, "you're gonna leave just like that?" Changkyun asked.

He would be lying if he said that he wasn't disappointed that his hyung didn't give a peck.

"Is there anything you wanna say?" Hyunwoo asked, "the others all gave me a peck." He said and Hyunwoo broke into a low and short fit of laughter as he leaned down and kissed his forehead, "good?" He said and booped Changkyun's nose with his index finger but Changkyun shook his head from side to side.

"They gave me pecks on the cheek." He pouts and Hyunwoo face palmed himself, "we've spoilt you too much." He said and looked at Changkyun for a few seconds and the younger smiled at him like a small puppy waiting for his award. 

Hyunwoo pushed him back onto the bed and tucked him under the blankets and when Changkyun was about to give up the idea of getting another peck from the older, Hyunwoo leaned down and kissed him on the cheek, close to his eye then another one close to his jawline. Changkyun smiled very widely to which Hyunwoo chuckled, "Good night kyunie," he said and left the room.

About 10 mins later, Changkyun was playing in his phone when Minhyuk finally finished washing up and came into their shared bedroom. Without drying his hair, he got under the blankets and swung one leg over Changkyun's body along with one arm circling him in his embrace, "hyung...you're choking me, I can't breathe." Changkyun breathed out, "good." Minhyuk giggled.

"This is your punishment." The older said. They laid there in silence for a few minutes before he spoke up again, "your punishment for letting Kihyun's cuddle you and for not talking to me about your feelings." He said and started stroking and intertwining his hand in Changkyun's black, messy hair.

That night, Changkyun fell into a deep slumber in his hyung's arms with absolutely no worries in the world.

Because he knew his members loved him.

**Author's Note:**

> PLEASE leave some feedback!
> 
>  
> 
> Requests are welcome!


End file.
